Hot and Tired and Annoyed!

We had a lovely day of cloudy, raininess yesterday, so today's high humidity and temperatures have sucked the energy right out of me.

Things are bad. Really bad. The Republicans picked up their toys and went home over the fact that the Democrats & President Obama want to raise taxes on those poor, starving millionaires in order to raise a couple of dollars toward the debt. Fine. Boehner & Cantor are rolling in cash and don't want to pay more. But WHY is it that POOR people think this is ok? People who are just getting by? People who aren't white?

Do these people think they are going to win the lottery and then they won't want to pay taxes on their millions? Do these people think that the "Christian" conservatives care about them one little iota?

Do I think that the President's latest pronouncement on raising taxes on the rich is something that he is going to stand behind? Or will have cave (again) like a poorly built house of cards?

I love the man, I really do, and I can list an incredible amount of things that he has done that has benefitted this country and the people in it, but if he had stood his ground about the tax cuts last December, maybe we would not be entering another dip in the recession that will not end.. although it has been over for TWO years.

DSD and I are doing ok, but things are tight everywhere. And I cannot imagine where we would be without his retirement and Tricare benefits. He is now on daily medication and I meet with a surgeon tomorrow to schedule surgery for an umbilical hernia. What if I weren't covered? Would I just suffer?

I have not talked to my friend about her mom in a couple of weeks. Last I heard there was a meeting scheduled with an oncologist and the mom said that she may opt out of treatment. My friend said that treatment would probably only give her another 12 months, but 12 months is a loooooong time if you are thinking about losing your mom.

Stepdaughter, son-in-law, and the grandchildren will be here in 10 short days! I'm taking the entire week off to spoil all of them. Beach, pool, snorkeling, sand castles, shrimp boil... all the things the Florida Gulf Coast is famous for! (So y'all can stop doing that rain dance now!)

A Note About Life

BabyBoy has been out of town since the day after Labor Day. His girl friend began classes at the University of South Florida in August and he went down there to visit with her, sleeping double in a single bed for several nights and then venturing over to the east coast of Florida to spend time with his father.  He has not had fun there and went back to Tampa for a few days then went back to his father's, girlfriend in tow, this evening. We have spoken every few days, including today, then via text at other times.

About 15 minutes ago (via text) he said, "For real, I think I am going to marry this girl."

And I DID know that was in his head. He has been different toward her/about her/in his tone when speaking of her, BUT...

I want him to be happy, more than anything. And I do not think he means in 2010 OR 2011, but, WOW, mommy has been weeping since the message came in. He's my baby. My only baby. And this seems different from other girlfriends.

Please, please, let him be happy. And let him produce a girl.. so I can pass that doll on.

The Labor Day Trip to Hell and Back*

As I said in my last post, DSD's daughter was scheduled to get married over Labor Day weekend, just north of Nashville. We loaded up in the car early Thursday morning, DSD, his oldest son, DSD jr and I, and set off. DSD jr was pleasant for the hour of the trip he was awake, DSD and I had Dan Brown's "The Lost Symbol" on CD** and away we went.

Now I have to interject here and explain that I have always felt that DSD jr has treated me with rudeness and disrespect, even during the 16-18 month period when he lived in my house. I had not had a problem with the daughter, whom we will call, SD, because I am not feeling too creative, until earlier this year. DSD's relationship with these children is not the best, most healthy in the world. I have never stood in the way of it, but they were graduating high school about the time we started dating, so they have been grown 90% of the time I have known them. When SD called our house last year on Father's Day to announce her pregnancy (she was past the 5 month mark) I was a little freaked, but she was 25 years old, would be 26 before the birth of the child and she was in a relationship and they weren't asking for money or our blessings. Great. Wonderful. Congratulations.

I jumped on board the baby wagon (hey! who doesn't love a baby??) and DSD and I immediately ordered the crib on her registry and I bought the baby (a boy) some great Florida Gator onesies and a couple of toys. (I did, those were not joint gifts).

Baby is born. I had a conference to Nashville. We meet the baby daddy and his 2 girls from a previous marriage (their mother died several years ago) and had a lovely weekend on the company's dime. Christmas arrived, I sent nice things for everyone and SD told DSD who told me she really loved everything. Rude? Well, yes, but BabyBoy has been guilty of the same thing, so I just went along with my life.

January 2010 - DSD received a Facebook request from SD.
Late January 2010 - LLL received a Facebook request from SD.
Early February 2010 - SD makes rude comments IN ALL CAPS about people (in general) on FB.
LLL (of course) immediately sends her a PRIVATE message explaining that all caps is considered yelling and I was just trying to help, because I didn't know how much time she had spent on social networking site.
Mid- February 2010- LLL is de-friended by SD.

I knew what had happened. But I feigned shock. And I said, "Hmmm, must've been a FB glitch." And I sent her another friend request. And she ignored it.

DSD finally asked her what had happened. And she told him (in an email) that she was a member of several different social (mommy) sites, that she had yelled intentionally, and that I had embarrassed her.

This was in March, maybe April.

We sent her a "First Mother's Day" card.

We sent her baby daddy a birthday card.

DSD received neither a Father's Day card nor a birthday card from her (or a phone call for either) and the wedding announcement was received via e-mail from her mother.

Fast forward to this weekend and you can understand why I was not looking forward to the trip.

Arrival at their house, hugs all around, weird. Discussion about the trip, see the girls (beautiful, well-behaved, literate girls), wait for the baby to wake from nap. Give baby his birthday present, take pictures of baby. Play with baby... from across the room, because I know better than to get to close. "Oh, LLL, did you want to help with the decorations? We are baking the cake and tying bows on really stupid stuff that was a complete and total waste of money, so THANKS for buying the beer!"

Friday, my in-laws arrived in a lovely reprieve of manners and kindness. Friday evening, was the rehearsal. No one had a clue. This song or that song, who is giving her away? DSD will walk her part way, then her step-father will walk her.. no, let's try this and that and.. Ok. That is the point of the rehearsal, except no one really figured out what was going on and it was still a fiasco on Saturday.

There is nothing wrong with a backyard wedding. Nothing. They are simple and sweet and inexpensive. There is nothing wrong with an outrageously stupidly, expensive church wedding an open bar and a sit down dinner for 500 of your closest friends. Just don't ask me to pay for it. And, please, don't combine the two, because that doesn't work. Aisle runners outside. First couple's dance with no other dancing. Champagne toast, but the rest of the champagne was hidden or something, because there was TONS left over that no one drank. (Because they didn't know it was there?)

The worst though, absolute worst part, was Sunday morning. We told everyone we would arrive at SD's house at 8:00, that we would visit for an hour or so and then get on the road. We arrived at 7:59. The house smelled deliciously of bacon. They sat down to breakfast at 8:20. At 8:30 I was asked if I wanted breakfast, because "there was plenty." DSD and I both declined and I had a couple of MickyD's cheeseburgers at 10:30.

Classy.

I am certain you really don't want to hear about all of this, but I vented to Facebook as much as I could, considering I don't want to hurt DSD's feelings. I tried to explain to a friend at work that maybe it was northern thing, but she corrected me, post haste. She is from Wisconsin.

So, that is my tale of woe. I do have something on the political front to post, but I have homework also. This took longer than I had anticipated. I am not holding my breath on hearing from his kids again. I will continue to send stuff to the children. But I am done with the grown ups.

*As opposed to the pizza joint in NW Florida Helen Back Cafe, which is supposed to have really great pizza.

**I would bet listening to a book on CD while you are driving would be great. But I was the passenger and I was bored. I would rather read if I am not driving.

#400 To End a Month of Birthdays

True Blue Texan made her 500th post yesterday. You should go read it, because it was sad and angry and inspirational all at once. I feel her pain. A lot of the reason I disappeared from this 'blog for so long was due to an overwhelming apathy about what was going on in this great country of ours. It is difficult to maintain the drive to post constantly and the desire to DO something when it seems that no one else is doing anything.

But I am back and this is my 400th post. My plan is to be here, but maybe not every single day. My plan is to continue to check out the 'blogs of others, but maybe not constantly. My plan is to continue to work toward a better future for the generations to come.

On another note, today is my step-daughter's 27th birthday and we will be attending her wedding on Saturday. I am looking forward to seeing my In-laws, but I have had a strained relationship with this girl since the first part of the year and with her brother for several years, so I am a little tense about it. His birthday was last week and I chose to not attend lunch with him and DSD.

DSD's birthday was yesterday. If the rain ever stops I am going to make him burn some sort of flesh on that new grill I got him. If it doesn't stop, I am going to put that new grill on the ark I am going to have to build.

DSD's LittleMan turned 16 earlier this month, just 3 days after my father-in-law turned 70 and the day before my niece turned 13.

August is a crazy month in the LeftLeaning household. I hope yours has been great.

Rats and Brats and the End of Summer

On June 1, we were a happy, healthy family of 3. DSD, Lola and I had our routine down whether it included taking the baby girl for a walk or cooking dinner. Then my son moved back home. I have missed him and am glad he is there, but it changed things up a bit. Then DSD's ex moved to California leaving LittleMan with us until the middle of August. LittleMan AND Henry, a 5 year old, anti-social West Highland Terrier.


So our family of 3 became a family of 6 and I am not dealing well with it. I love LittleMan, but that does not mean that I LIKE him. He is incredibly socially awkward. He may actually be slightly mentally challenged he is just that awkward. DSD and I had a discussion yesterday afternoon, about Henry, with LittleMan standing between us and when DSD asked him a question LittleMan looked around like he was coming out of a trance. This was in the kitchen, so he wasn't watching TV.


On top of that, Henry is not well behaved at all. He is house broken, but he has NO doggy manners. He does not sit, he does not stay, he does not come, he.does.not.listen. And Lola thinks he is her brand new chew toy. She wants to squeak him. She will cease and desist once you get her attention, but she really is still a puppy. An 80 pound puppy. I spend a lot of time hearing, "Lola stop. Lola quit. Lola leave him alone." And it pisses me off.

And the ex 'forgot' to check whether Henry could fly out with LittleMan. And she 'forgot' to find out what paperwork would be required to let him on the plane. And, so far, she has 'forgotten' to make Henry reservations.

So DSD decided it would be swell for us to go visit his parents before the LittleMan leaves the state. They are six hours away. Frankly, it makes me want to kick something to think of my lost weekend. I actually love my in-laws, but they EXHAUST me. Did I mention that I was completely mentally exhausted already? And I am supposed to start back to school in 13 days?

Maybe I will run away instead.

A Shorter Summer for School Kids? Bring it on!

Even when I was in middle (called jr. high then) school and high school, I thought the summers were toooooo long. I was always one of those dorks who looked forward to the beginning of school and, normally, didn't start praying for it to be over until after Christmas. I know, FREAK, but I truly loved school.

Now, don't get me wrong, I didn't want to go to school for MORE days a year, I just wanted the vacations spaced differently. I didn't know why we couldn't have an entire week off for Thanksgiving, it would have made travel easier. I didn't know why we couldn't have an extra week for Christmas and maybe 2 for Spring Break. I didn't want more than 6 weeks off in the summer. My mom worked, I was BORED!

Now

Arne Duncan, the Cabinet secretary charged with overhauling America's educational system, is studying programs that keep kids in school longer to boost their academic achievements.

Since I have been out of the public school system for quite some time, and I don't even have a child attending public school (he's in community college) maybe this isn't an issue I should tackle.
But I will anyway.

Our education system is failing our children. Our teachers are overworked and underpaid. Our classrooms are overcrowded. And these hard economic times are making it worse with many teachers losing their jobs and many schools closing (several in Bay County alone). The model we use to run our schools is antiquated and out of date. Most children attending school now do not have to be on the farms in the summer to help out, so the long summers off are just allowing their brains to atrophy without good reason.

What is the answer? Maybe longer days. Other countries certainly have them. And it would help out those who can not afford to stay home with their children, by cutting day care costs. Maybe longer school years. This would, again, help those with younger children paying day care costs and it would give the teachers more time to ensure that our children are fully educated and not just taught to pass one certain test a year. (Full disclosure: I hate the FCAT and feel there has been too much focus on it since its inception.)

Another bonus to a longer school year would be to get rid of those who go into the profession just for summers off. We've all had wonderful teachers who were great at their jobs and obviously loved teaching the next generation. We've all had teachers who were just putting in their time until summer or retirement also.

The downfall? It would cost money, of course, and where will the states, counties and cities get it? More government funding? Higher taxes? I can hear the screaming about that already. But what choice do we have? Our children are getting more stupid by the year and just propping up the current system will not help at all!

Proud Mom!

BabyBoy has been attending the local community college for 3 semesters now. His performance has been, shall we say, less than stellar. He seems to be taking a while to get the hang of college and has been hesitant to ask for help. I don't know why and it annoys me, because he would not have gotten a 50% on his term paper in Eng1102 if I had looked it over.

BUT, he has done well enough this year to pick up a $700.00 scholarship from the theatre department and this will go a long way toward paying for next semester's classes. And should even give him a couple of dollars spending money.

So I am very proud of him and the strides he is making. Hopefully next semester will be the one where he REALLY gets his act together and manages to get the grades I know he is capable of.

Lola is better...

As a mom, I've known about the B.R.A.T. diet for year. No, that isn't the diet you feed your brat, it is the diet you feed your lovely, well-behaved child when they have diarrhea. Bananas, Rice, Apple Sauce, Toast. Dry toast.

Well, everything dear ol' Google gave me said 'rice' for dogs, there was no mention of the other 3. And I was afraid to try apple sauce or bananas, since we are a strict 'dog food only' household. But the rice seems to have worked. She hasn't had an accident since Wednesday morning. We aren't sure that she has gone at all. She likes to go around to the other side of the house when she does her business, where there are no lights after dark. But this morning she ate normally, and pooped close to normally. How crazy is my life when I spend my days blogging about dog poop? You should see the lovely notes I leave DSD in the morning before work. In the past the notes were sweet and silly and loving, this morning's note read,
"Good morning,
Lola DID poop this morning. It started out healthy, but was a little runny near the end so keep a close eye on her.
See you this afternoon.
I LOVE YOU!"

Nice, huh?

Unfortunately, DSD and BabyBoy have the cold that is going around. So does my boss and several other people at work. I'm taking my Vitamin C, washing my hands thoroughly and using my hand sanitizer, hopefully that will be enough.

B- *Updated*

Woo Hoo!

After much fussing from his mother (yea, that's me!) my son managed to pull a B- on his research paper. I just received a text message from him thanking me for my help on the research part. He wrote the whole thing; I just did minor editing and that is completely acceptable.



Crap. What if it is an April Fool's Day joke?
I may well kill him.

**It was not an April Fool's Day joke. He really did get a B-**

I am not as smart as a 1st grader

Well, I hope everyone in the blogging world had a great day. Ours was wonderful. Great food and great people normally equals a spectacular day and ours was.

After the leftovers had been put away and the dishes done and all of the guests went home, my son's friend, Ryan, came over and brought his mother's new game, "Are you smarter than a 5th grader?". This is a popular night time game show that my parents love, but I have never watched. It sounded like fun to play and I was interested in seeing how I did compared to the children in grade school right now.

There were 4 of us playing, my son, DSD's youngest son, Ryan and me. Ryan won the first game without ever giving me a chance. I knew a lot of the answers to his questions, Fe is the symbol for iron, 75 is an odd (not even) number... how hard could this be?

My son started the 2nd game and I should have known I was in trouble when his 2nd question (a 1st grade one) had the answer congruent. How exactly are congruent triangles taught in the 1st grade? Where are they taught in the 1st grade? Really, if you learned about congruent triangles in the 1st grade, please let me know.

It was finally my turn. I answered the first one correctly, it was not difficult. The answer to the second question was Louisiana. The question was 1st grade music. Do you have any idea what the question was on? Yes. "Oh, Susanah" The person singing was coming from Alabama and going where? I bombed it. There are a lot of things I remember about first grade, that was not one of them.

So, I am not as smart as a 1st grader. Oh, well, I would like to see a 1st grader negotiate the name change and benefits update I have recently gone through. Maybe they know the words to "Oh, Susanah", but I understand my 401k. Can a first grader top that?

Friday BSing

Work, work, work with no time to blog. How horrible is that? I should probably be working now, but I figured I could take a few minutes to babble.

**My son's little sister was born Nov 5th. He is very excited to finally be a big brother (he's only been asking for about 10 years). He is calling her Kaylee. That is not her name, but the poor thing's name is really just AWFUL and he refuses to use it. Poor baby, an awful name and that man for a father. I hope he has grown up a lot since our son was that age or she is in for a long, hard life.

**The week after the honeymoon I went back for my 6 month recheck mamogram. There has been no change so the doctors don't seem concerned at all. I will have another (both breasts this time, I can't wait!) in 6 more months and then back to the yearly thing. I know that men hate the prostate check, but give me a break. It is only a couple of minutes and you are on your way. I would much rather have a prostate check than a Pap and Mamogram (if, you know, I had a prostate). Stop whining and get checked.

**2-3 more weeks of regular Div I college football. What a wild season it has been! Another #2 lost last night. Oregon fell after their QB fell. Who's next? I can't even begin to predict who will end up in the BCS games. I just hope Ohio State kicks Michigan's ass tomorrow and Florida whips FSU the following Saturday. (And if Georgia and Tennessee could each lose a game in the next 2 weeks, allowing Florida to play LSU again in Atlanta for the SEC Championship... well, I am fine with that, too.)

**Married life is awesome. :-)

**I mentioned in this post that we were pushing for DSD's youngest son to come live with us. Or at least we were discussing it. The child's mother was not happy at that idea and there is no justification for suing her for custody. She is not a bad mother. It isn't like she beats him or mistreats him. She loves him and takes great care of him. Sadly, I think she takes TOO good care of him. Is that even possible? He is 13 years old. When does anything become his responsibility? He is not working on grade level and she wants to spend $1300 a month in tutoring to get him up to grade level so that he can go on to HS next year. HELLO! My house payment is not $1300 a month! And I do not know how spending another $1300 a month on tutors is going to make him pay attention and learn. Can a child be MADE to learn? Plus tutoring is not going to help his immaturity or lack of social skills.

As soon as we get our insurance straightened out (shouldn't take long, just getting the paperwork in) we are going to get this child into longterm therapy. His issues are not NORMAL. Maybe there is something else wrong besides just AD/HD. Maybe he has a learning disability also, but there are problems. And they need to be addressed and apparently I am the only one who sees how HUGE they are.

** Not much more going on (that I can think of now). Getting ready for Thanksgiving. Trying not to think about Christmas. Enjoying life. What more can a person ask for?